This time every year our office pulls out all the stops to raise funds for the United Way. Last year we collected towels to donate to a shelter (I think I’m remembering that correctly). One of the partners even donned a towel turban and the alter-ego: Towel Man as part of the push. This year we’re collecting socks for a local women’s shelter. Every year we have different activities designed to get people involved. There’s an annual coin challenge between the floors with the winning floor usually receiving some sort of gourmet baked goods. And every year there is a karaoke concert as part of the finale. People volunteer to be candidates for singing and you can cast as many votes as you want to buy. All the money raised goes to the United Way. It never fails to amuse and entertain, not to mention raise beaucoup bucks!
So, this year the firm ramped it up a bit. Last week there was a staff carnival in the cafe, complete with Wii games played on a big screen, pie-throwing at the attorneys and a photo booth! I meant to get down there but my work load was pretty heavy that day and I missed it. Apparently it was a LOT of fun. This week though will probably be the highlight of the whole campaign. Below is the content of an email we received last Friday. Apologies in advance – it’s very long!
Do I work for a cool firm or what?
From: Zombie Master Sent: Friday, October 25, 2013 2:29 PM To: ALL
Subject: Humans v. Zombies – FAQs
It is a voluntary game to raise money for United Way.
It has come to the attention of the game administration that there might be some confusion / concern / questions about the game. The following is the game administration’s feeble attempt to address those concerns and to assuage your fears.
Yes, this is a game.
Yes, it is a game of “tag” played in the office.
Yes, it is supposed be to fun.
No, if it does not sound like fun for you, you do not need to play.
No, there are no real Zombies.
No, the sirens you hear are not related to a Zombie invasion.
No, seriously, there are no real Zombies involved in this game.
Yes, it is a voluntary game designed to raise money for United Way.
We raise money by people buying extra lives by donating to United Way.
Background / additional information –
There is one Zombie who has been infected our office.
You will not know who that Zombie is unless the Zombie tags (touches gently on the shoulder/arm) you or you see the Zombie’s red wrist band.
Starting Monday at 10:00 am there is a Zombie who will be “tagging” humans and turning them into Zombies.
Zombies wear a red wrist band.
You will know a Zombie because of the red wrist band.
You protect yourself from being tagged (touched gently on the shoulder/arm) by a Zombie by hitting the Zombie with a sock before the Zombie can touch you.
If you are tagged by a Zombie, you can buy an extra life by contributing to United Way.
Come to the sign-up sheet outside of my office on floor 27 , sign your name and you are “alive” again.
In doing so, you have purchased a retroactive antidote.
Once you are turned into a Zombie, you are a Zombie unless you buy a new life.
As a Zombie you get to tag the remaining humans.
A Zombie attack or effort at tagging is repelled by being hit by a sock.
Socks and red wrist bands will be in the Humans vs. Zombies boxes found in the elevator lobby of your floor (except 29 where they are in the kitchen) on Monday by 9:00 am.
Yes, they are clean, unused socks are being provided for you to use.
The opt in / opt out and “Are you a Zombie now?” floor maps will be taped to the wall above the Humans vs. Zombies boxes found in the elevator lobby of your floor.
Game starts at 10:00 am.
This is a voluntary game to raise money for United Way.
Opt out – To opt out, please simply put a yellow stickie on your name plate and a black X on the floor map in the elevator lobby of your floor Monday. To be safe when walking the halls, put a yellow stickie on your badge as you walk the halls.
Resending of the Rules:
As you know by now, the City has been infected with Zombies who have escaped from Harborview.* The Zombies will have made their way to our building by Monday morning, October 28, 2013, bypassed security, and have infected someone in our office. This, despite the valiant efforts of building security and the team on floor 19 and 29.
The Zombie needs to “feed” him or herself by tagging a human at least once every 24 hours. Tagged humans turn into zombies. All the humans on floors 18, 19, 26, 27, 28, 30 and 31 are potential victims.* * Those on floor 29 are potential victims when off floor 29.
- Zombies wear a red zombie wrist band. (See the elevator lobby to get the wrist band.) Or if none, then something that is noticeably red.
- Wrist bands cannot be concealed.
- Zombies turn humans into Zombies by tagging humans with their hand.
- Humans can stun a Zombie for 15 minutes by hitting the zombie with a sock. (Note the small socks on your chair or elevator lobby.) The Zombie cannot tag humans during this 15 minutes and instead must return to work for the full duration of the 15 minutes. (preferably all billable time)
- Humans are safe (cannot be tagged) if they are in their or another’s work space, a conference room on their floor, or on floor 29.
- Humans are safe in the cafeteria and food service areas of 19 (food spillage concerns). Humans are not safe in the halls or elevator lobby on 19.
- Zombies do not need to use sanitary facilities. Thus, restrooms are safe zones.
- Once a human has been tagged, the human has 10 minutes to go the floor map in the elevator lobby (for their floor) and mark the former human’s work space with a red Z unless they purchase a new human life within that 10 minutes. If no new life is purchased, the newly converted Zombie takes a red wrist band and can now tag a human. The newly converted Zombie is to deposit any socks in the basket / bucket in the elevator lobby. (This allows the ever decreasing number of humans access to added ammunition – socks — to use in repelling the increasing Zombie attack.)
- Humans can purchase additional lives by donating to United Way (suggested donations of $5 staff, $10 associate, and $20 partner). You must send an email to the Zombie Master if you are purchasing a new life.
- The Zombie with the most tagged humans may get a prize too.
- Rules can (and will) be changed by the Zombie Master at any time to suit the flow of the game and his personal whim.
• Humans – survival.
• Zombies – tag (capture – bite) all the humans.
The End Game
• Ultimately, the number of Zombies might become too much for the humans to withstand, and the remaining humans will be forced to effect an escape from the building. Those fortunate few remaining humans will need to be evacuated from the Café at 4:00 pm on November 1, 2013.
* Between now and then you will be receiving information about the Zombie events in the community. Don’t be alarmed. This is all make believe!!!
* * We recognize that this game may not be for everyone. You may opt out. To opt out, please simply put a yellow stickie on your name plate and a yellow or black X on the floor map in the elevator lobby of your floor Monday. And if you want, put a yellow stickie on your K&L Gates badge as you walk the halls.